a digression from the plan.....

We had great plans for yesterday -- a bit of working in the garden, reading the paper at a leisurely pace, a bit of sketching and graphic work on a new quilt design and the web site then a nice dinner of chicken and fresh veggies from the farmers market

Alas, it was not to be

Instead we spent the entire afternoon and well into the evening sitting in the emergency room of our nearest hospital -- and it was far longer than we needed to be there

Shortly after breakfast the DH said he was having pain under his left arm that sort of wrapped around to his shoulder blade and a bit toward the front. He had taken Tylenol (the only over the counter pain killer he can handle), and it hadn't helped much.

So I called his doctor's office and had a chat with the urgent care nurse who suggested (after asking a lot of questions) that I should take him to the nearest emergency room to be checked out.

Off we go to the ER

The intake nurses were great -- no sooner had I started writing the information on the card at the desk when the nurse came with a wheel chair and whisked him into the room to take readings, put him on oxygen and quiz us about his medications (he carries a laminated card in his wallet -- thank goodness!), his symptoms and especially his allergies -- they gave him the usual id bracelet and TWO red bracelets with his allergies on them

The nurses on the emergency ward were great too -- checking his vital signs, the lab testing done promptly, the x-ray department taking a chest x-ray with their cute little portable unit -- all with normal results, except for one blood test that indicated that he MIGHT have a blood clot somewhere.

So the doctor in charge in the ER tells us that they need to call in a technician to do the special scan to see if there is a clot (usually this is done with a CAT scan, but that involves using a dye that he's allergic to), and they are calling him in. That was at 1:30.

Then began the waiting --- and WAITING --- and WAITING!

Around 2:30 we asked for the doctor to come back in because the pain level had gone back up

Around 4:15 I was back out wanting to know just how long he was going to have to wait for this test, and voicing concerns about the fact that it had been such a long time since he had eaten

By 6:00 he was at the "mad as hell" stage and ready to just sign himself out when they FINALLY came and took him for the test.

While the technicians were doing the test (a wonderfully pleasant husband and wife team), we found out from them that even though we were told at 1:30 that they had been called, they weren't actually called until 4:30!

After the test, they came in and asked him if he wanted something to eat, but they didn't offer to get him his medication (for diabetics that are treated with medication, meal time means the right little pills too)

Finally at about 7:30 the nurse came in and told us that all of the tests were normal and probably he had just strained a muscle in his side. The nurse brought in the doctor's follow up orders (note: from the time the doctor told us at 1:30 that the test needed to be run we never saw him again!)

There on the follow up sheet it said: "Ibuprofen 600-800mg every 6-8hrs as needed for pain"

HELLO! what part of anaphylactic shock didn't this bird brain get? This is why all the RED allergy bracelets -- he's allergic to this stuff, as in, he stops breathing!! We obviously will NOT be following those orders.

and I will be writing a letter to the hospital's administrator about the very poor way this was handled (I'm off now to mix up a batch of "poison" to load my pen with)

geesh!

Writer? Blogger? Both?

I have a "favorites" list that includes a pretty diverse group of blogs that I try to get to at least a couple of times a week.

The subject matter on these is fun, serious, artful and personal. Some of them make me laugh, some make me cry, some make be cheer and occasionally one will make me angry, but they are all interesting.

Over at Travelin Oma's Library and marta writes (a delightful mother/daughter pair of blogs if ever I saw one!) there has been some thought provoking discussion about why folks blog.

There were a couple of things they said that really got me to thinking about my blogs.

1. In Marta's post she says: "my main blogging goal is to write it out, find my voice, being true to myself, to whatever is whirling in my mind and just write. yet, i also want to make you love me."

2. Oma has this to say: "I blog the way I used to write in my journal. ... I kept my journal, imagining the people who would someday read it. It wasn't ever meant to be totally private. I'm an audience kind of writer. For me, writing doesn't feel complete unless someone reads it."

To each of them I want to say a loud, resounding YES!

I actually write several blogs, and each of them has its own purpose. The first one I started was because I wanted to keep in touch with people that had purchased a piece of my artwork, and to let them know what I was working on next.

This blog has always been intended to be a much more personal one, but like Oma, my writing doesn't feel complete unless someone reads it.

Maybe its the little kid in me that ALWAYS wants your attention, I get so excited when I get a comment on anything I've written.

This is the place that the whining and ranting goes on. It is the place that I feel safe in saying things that are difficult for me to say to myself and I am always touched and humbled when someone out there in the big wide world "hears" it and reaches back to touch my hand and my heart.

Oma asks in her post if we journal too -- I don't.

My blogging is my journal.

I have a friend in California that fills several 2 inch binder notebooks every year (I always see to it that she has the first one to start in as a Christmas gift). She carefully writes about what she has done and where she has been, she keeps letters and cards and children's art work. She is building a treasure for her children and her grandchildren in the future -- I hope they will appreciate it.

So, I don't hand write -- I blog and I put in lots of pictures -- and I have folders where I have printed out each entry.

And then there is the question of "is this writing"? It's sort of like asking "is it art"? Could we say that writing, like art, is in the eye of the beholder? Is what we write in our blogs more or less likely to be "writing"? Is it only writing if it gets published?

I don't know.

I only know that most days I feel better for the experience. And better still if someone reads it and comments -- yes, its the exhibitionist side of me -- because someone has "heard" what I had to say

If we didn't want someone to read it, we wouldn't put it out on the web

if there is no one to hear it, does the falling tree make a sound? yes, but no one cares

we blog because we want to be heard

Happy Anniversary

Today is our wedding anniversary.


We got a card in the mail from our daughter earlier in the week, which was cute and really sweet.

And this afternoon we'll be off setting up a booth for the art show we'll be doing tomorrow and Sunday.

No fancy dinner for us -- just working together on displaying the art jewelry we both work on.

Frankly, after the past few months, its a marvel that he hasn't "done me in" -- as I've been negotiating a roller coaster of emotional upheaval, trying hard to figure out the "now what" of being the mother of an adult child that is now married and really doesn't need my constant attention.

We're adjusting to the health concerns as well, and I'm trying to stop being so self centered as I make myself do things that are "good" for me (even when I don't want to!)

And so, we've survived another year --- and hope for the next one to be better!

the way into print.....

appears to be through letters to the editor!






















Early last week the Denver paper ran an article about the people that live in an area that has been called The Hayman Fire -- a massive fire that happened 6 years ago and was accidently set by a woman that was burning a distressing letter from her husband.

I was so struck by the hate that seemed to flow out of the page that I wrote a letter to the editor about it.

Mid week I got a call from the editor's office to get my permission to print it.

It will be interesting to watch the on-line forum to see if there are any responses to it.

one of life's random experiences.......

This morning's usual routine was interrupted by a a trip to the local DMV that was not planned until yesterday morning.

It seems when my husband went in to have some blood work done yesterday, they asked him for his photo id. When they handed it back to him, he looked at it (who knows why) and realized that it had expired LAST AUGUST!!

Needless to say, he forked over the keys and we decided that a trip to take care of the issue would be in order post haste!

(we were used to living in a state that sent out reminders in the mail -- I guess they don't do that here)

Anyway, this morning, we went over to the DMV, and as we're standing in line we were talking to a lady that was there with her son who was taking his test for his first driver's license.

As we talked, she revealed that she moved to our state from New Orleans after Katrina -- they lost their home and every thing in it, having lived in the St Bernard Parish (right next door to the 9th Ward, which has gotten a lot of press).

The only thing they were able to later retrieve was a gold ring set with little diamonds that she had left sitting in the window sill of the kitchen that Sunday morning before the hurricane. When they were finally able to get back into their home, it was still sitting there -- a real strange twist considering that everything else in the house was so turned upside down.

She also told me that in the last 6 months as they were on a family vacation back to that area, her husband died while they were on the road.

I was stunned. I would never have guessed she'd seen all that trouble.

A true testament to the strength of the human spirit.

My grandmother used to have a little frame above her desk that had this saying in it:

I used to complain because I had no shoes, until I met a man that had no feet.

Ok, I get the message -- time to quit whining --

Looking back another way.....

Over at Traveling Oma, Marty was talking about having credentials to do things.

Now days, folks are pretty hung up in this idea. You practically have to have a degree in everything.

I never did get that college degree -- got busy with living instead I guess, and then there was the whole "what do you want to major in?" issue. If I had it to do again, I'd go major in art and writing.

But I also believe that what you learn along the way as you're living is worth while too (remember: life is what happens while you're making other plans)

So I've been thinking about all the things I have developed the ability to do, and figured it would help me to recognize those things.

Here then is my list:

* I know enough about remodeling to be the General Contractor on a major project -- I have personally done these things: paint a room (and clean up!); lay ceramic tile on a floor, a counter and in a shower; install an electrical outlet, an exhaust fan and a ceiling fixture; replace a washer in a faucet; hang a drapery rod; hang, tape and seal dry wall; install kitchen cabinets

* I can pack a whole household of stuff and have everything arrive at its destination intact (oh yeah, I drove the truck and towed the car too)

* I can organize a large event involving many other people

* I can bake and decorate a wedding cake

* I can create a teddy bear, a doll and a quilt from idea to finished item

* I can sew clothing (every formal my daughter wore in high school had my designer label in it)

* I can create a web site (taught myself HTML code when I had a back injury)

* I can cook a meal reasonably well, and I make a mean pot of apple butter

* I can supervise an accounts payable department in a large corporation

* I'm a good listener for an adult daughter (guess I did a good job listening from the time she was real little!)

* I can change a tire, check the fluids and know enough about auto mechanics to keep the repair shop from ripping me off with stuff that isn't true

* I can knit a sweater, a scarf, a vest, an afghan, a pair of mittens, and a variety of animal toys (just don't ask me to do socks!)

* I can write a reasonably clear business letter


I'm thinking there are probably a lot of other things I haven't thought of to put on this list -- I may add them as they come to me

So, what can you do?

on becoming art educated

its funny how one acquires knowledge

not long ago a friend sent me this card

The picture is titled "water heater walking" and its one of Dada's works

Now the fellow in question is an artist in his own right, but he was just struck by the humor of this particular piece and it made him think of us after all of our water heater issues last fall

To be honest, I had heard the name Dada, but I really had no clear idea of who he was (other than an artist) or when and where he worked or what his vision was

I've been getting educated --- just plug the word "dada" into Google and you'll get an eye full (so to speak!)

In a way some of what I'm seeing in some new publications, like Art Doll Quarterly reminds me of the dadaists -- assemblage, collage and lots of statements being made about life and politics --

and I find that the more I see and think about those pieces, the better I understand them -- and might be interested in creating some of my own "assemblage" pieces

something to think on anyway

Clean enough to be healthy......

Over at Bear Naked, there's a great post about dusting.

It made me think about the time when my daughter was little -- she had some friends that had big houses that always looked like they had just been finished by the decorator -- not a thing out of place -- and no real sign that any one really "lived" there

I definately had a more casual approach to cleaning -- the kitchen was clean, the house was clean enough to be healthy -- but I wanted to spend time with my kid -- doing messy art projects (shaving cream finger paint on the formica table top!), a trip to the library or a museum or a concert -- dust will always be there, children will not!

So, my house still is not a show piece, but it does look like we live here -- there is mohair fabric in the living room next to the tub full of teddy bears; there are little boxes of yarn next to the box of afghan squares and wool hats that have been knit for charity in the dining room; there are plastic shoe boxes full of beads stacked in the kitchen and a work tray of a bead project in the family room -- yup, it looks like the studio has exploded all over the house!

When I was talking to my daughter the other day, she was talking about her house -- her comment was "I clean when I can't find something" -- like mom, her kitchen is clean enough to eat out of -- but also like mom, she has "stuff" -- I'm so glad she found a great guy that doesn't get all upset about it (he has his own "stuff"!)

But there may be "cleaning" in the near future -- we just signed up for a community garage sale for next Saturday --- now where did I put that tennis racket and the box of books?

shopping, the great speckled dog and learning to eat all over again

As I've been whining about the past week or so, I've been trying to walk every day

This is one of the liners from my old walking shoes (these babies are at least 8 years old, so cut me some slack here!)

So, after some discussion, we decided to go looking for new liners (I had bought a new pair of shoes about 4 years ago, and they always hurt my foot, so I was more interested in just making the old shoes better!)

Talk about sticker shock!!

A new pair of liners (which, by the way, I'm not even sure would fit in those old shoes) would have cost me at least $15, or as much as $20!!



So, here we are --- in the box a brand new pair of shoes -- for what it would have cost me to replace the liners!

Oh yeah, there are also new socks (let us say that my socks were in pretty sad shape, and there is no point getting blisters in my new shoes!)

And a new and healthy snack -- toasted edamame -- quite tasty actually




So off I went this morning in my new shoes, and while my feet (and knees!) felt fine afterwards, I could not manage as much distance this morning and came back feeling sort of discouraged -- not to mention panting like I'd been running for miles -- what the ????

I think I'm having some major allergy issues -- notice the white spots on the black dog?

Its COTTONWOOD!!! It is absolutely the worst I can ever remember -- it literally looks like its snowing

Ok, I'll hang in there and keep trying -- the cottonwood won't last forever

Meantime, I'm trying to learn to eat all over again.

I admit it, I'm one of those people that really enjoys eating (not to mention that is pretty much the one pleasure still available to me) -- and I like meat -- I do not think of a great meal as a plate that includes nothing but veggies -- and I'm going kicking and screaming in that direction

unfortunately, food is not like tobacco or alcohol where you can simply stop using it (well, ok, not simply, but you can stop)

Going to the grocery store has become a whole new field of land mines to negotiate.

I'm trying to be good, but I can't say I'm feeling good about it -- not yet anyway

(like the exercising -- how long does it take before you feel better anyway??)

And can someone tell me why every snack bar/protein bar type thing on the market has to taste SWEET!? Someone could make a fortune from me if they could make one that tasted like a bacon cheese burger, or a BLT with avacado

just saying.....

Thoughts about humiliation

I've decided that I need to share a deep dark secret to keep someone dear to me from having to repeat the error of our ways

It has to do with humiliation and the horrid things it can do to a relationship

Here's the secret:

Back when my daughter was about 9 (she's almost 25 now, so this was about 16 years ago), I let her have her hair cut without consulting her dad about it.

He went balistic (to put it mildly); berating me and saying some really unkind hurtful things -- now these things happen, but the worst part of it was that he did it in front of my parents.

To say it put a wall between us is a major understatement -- it created an atmosphere, mostly on my end that lead to some other very poor choices and some huge problems later.

It also took me until just recently (yes 16 years later!!) to be able to say out loud to him how that incident hurt (and scarred) me

I over heard someone the other day do a similar thing over something small. I could see the hurt in the person's eyes, and I know that person felt that same sting of humiliation.

So here's my piece of advice: you're going to have disagreements over little stuff (and big stuff) -- you'll need to discuss them -- please, for the sake of your love for each other and your future together, save it for when its just the two of you -- spare that pride and feeling of self worth in your partner by not humiliating them in front of anyone else (think about how you'd feel about it if the situation was reversed)

You'll both feel better for it

more rejection slips for the wall.....

While I was out and about yesterday, the postman deposited a box on my front porch.

Last fall I had sent a handbag to Haute Handbags in hopes of having it included in one of their future issues.

It has returned with a form letter telling me that I should consider submitting a different piece for the Fall 2008 issue -- deadline date? -- May 15 -- Hello -- the box with its form letter arrived on --- wait for it --- May 15!


I also got a letter from the show in Columbia, MO that takes place in September that we didn't make the cut for it either......course at the ever rising cost of gas, that may actually be a blessing.....who knows


sure would be good if I could figure out what it is would actually make the cut -- in either situation

oh well

so is success the opposite of failure?

well, not so much maybe

most of the definition of success now days has to do with finacial achievement, as in: Donald Trump is a big success, and Martha Stewart and Ophra

ok

I'm thinking that kind of success is totally out of the relm of possibility for my life

so what else is success?

my success has been that my daughter has grown to be a beautiful young woman that has been willing to step into adulthood and take on its responsibilities while still maintaining her passion for practicing her talents

for the last 25 years my life has largely been centered around making sure what she needed was somehow accomplished to the best of my abilities

so now what?

at the age of 57, there's a good probability I will live for at least another 30 years

it is that long span of unplanned time, yawning like a huge cat, waiting to swallow me up that is the current dragon to be slain

I envy those folks at my age that are still off doing purposeful things (at least to them) in the corporate world -- yes, my dirty little secret -- I sometimes actually miss that feeling of having somewhere to go 5 days a week and where someone cared if I was there or not

I also envy those folks that knew enough to plan well enough or got lucky enough to have the means to travel and see art and attend the theatre

it leaves me to question just how to survive another 30 years

the rebel in my make up has always taken the attack approach -- work harder (ie: more hours), change jobs, or move to a new place to start over

are some people just destined to do well? Are they "fated" to make the right choices, guided to know what to do?

is it just dumb luck?

in my experience, wishing doesn't make it so (why don't I deserve to win the lotto?)

and I haven't heard any voice from anywhere telling me what to do next to "fix" it

It makes me think of the lyric Tim Rice wrote for a song from Aida

Is it written in the stars
Are we paying for some crime
Is that all that we are good for
Just a stretch of mortal time

For some god's experiment
In which we have no say
In which we're given paradise
But only for a day

so, is the free agency to choose just punishment?

its the emergency broadcast system: this has been a test -- if this was a real emergency you would have been told where to go and what to do

guess not

being the perfect failure

This theme seemingly will not go away

Let me explain

About a month ago I went to the annual Health Fair event to have my yearly blood work done

After a year of trying to improve my diet and taking my RX, etc., etc., I can report that the numbers are


(drum roll here)



WORSE!


Which only leads me to the question ---- why am I bothering??

just saying


I'm going off now to try to resign myself to having no control over this whole thing and I guess when its my time to go, I'm gone

Slaying the Dragon -- or Not Being Afraid to Fail

Yesterday in my email box I found this link to a blog that addresses this subject.

My sister had sent it to me, and I'm really glad she decided to share it with me (what she was doing up on her computer at 1:32 AM!, is a whole 'nuther question I need to ask her about!!)

The premise of the post deals with cutting into really expensive fabric, and as a sewer, I can relate to this "fear".

I remember when I bought my very first piece of mohair fabric about 15 years ago.

It was lovely, soft, a nice cream with a wonderful lavendar tip, I paid $35 for a quarter of a yard of the stuff --- and I was scared to cut it --- what if I ruined it?

Suffice it to say I found the courage and cut it, and now, because I've made many, many mohair bears, I don't worry about cutting into fabric that costs me $150 a yard any more --- I worry about SELLING the bear when its done, but that's a whole other problem and has nothing to do with fear.

There were three things in the post that especially stood out in my mind:

#1 -- "That's just what failure is, or what it ought to be: failure is just figuring stuff out the hard way."

and

#2 -- "Sometimes when people say they're afraid of failure, what they really mean is that they are afraid of humiliation."

and

#3 -- "humiliation passes... you remember it for months; the witnesses remember it for seconds (they have their own humiliations to obsess over, and don't have time for yours)."

Erin does a great thing here -- she talks about the roots of the fear, but she also gives us some hope for conquering the fear. A reminder that most of us (especially those of us who "create" for a living) are our own worst critics.

I remember once, back in the day when I worked an office job, that there was a young gal that worked in the office with me that had finished all of the training to do a rock climb and she was afraid to go actually climb. I sat down with her one Friday afternoon and we talked about it. I must have said the right things to her because when she came to work on Monday she had a slight sunburn, a skinned elbow and a hugh dose of self confidence because she had faced the dragon and conquered it. (some days I wish I had a "me" to do this for me!)

And the point here goes back to Erin saying that failure is figuring stuff out the hard way.

I've spent some time lately wishing I could afford to go a take a few classes on techniques for bears and jewelry and quilts because in that "figuring stuff out the hard way" there is a certain amount of frustration (especially for those of us that want to run before we crawl -- or play "Moonlight Sonata" as our first piano piece!)

There is an up side to NOT taking all those classes tho' (aside from the $$ saved).

One of the things that happens to me when I take classes, is I tend to start building little boxes that tell me things can only be done with the materials and instructions that the teacher used.

By not taking a class I am freed to try things about which a teacher would say "you can't use that material" or "you can't use that tool" or "that won't work"

In the process I create things that no one has seen before.

It can be frustrating trying to explain them to an unappreciative customer at a show, and sometimes even to the show jury, but it is definately interesting.

And so, I'm going to try to consider that "the witnesses will be obsessing over their own humiliations" -- sort of like picturing the audience at your speech in their underwear --

So what dragon will you slay today?

"Go ask Alice"

Do you remember that lyric? Jefferson Airplane? Grace Slick?

I was not part of the "drug scene" of the 1960s, but the music I remember.

And this morning, as I was working away on my computer, the DH tells me to turn on the TV down here in my little basement dungeon to see the artist they're interviewing

and there she was --- WHITE hair half way down to her waist, talking about her PAINTINGS!!! (she's 68 years old -- amazing!!)

and yes, she still seems to be fascinated with Alice and the White Rabbit, but I was amazed and delighted by her drawings......they are bright and bold and direct --- sort of like her music was

In the interview she said that painting is what she does now instead of singing, and that if she couldn't do that she'd write or do some other kind of art

ah ha!! the artistic drive will always find a way to be expressed

it occurs to me (ok, DUH!!) that this is a familiar theme -- does the name Tony Bennet ring a bell? Music -- painting

it would be totally arrogant on my part to put myself in the same catagory with Grace Slick and Tony Bennet, but perhaps I'm not so odd -- not so famous, but not so odd either!!

Want to see some of her stuff? Use this link to check out a gallery that has some of her work available for sale.

(and now, I'll be humming "White Rabbit" all day long!!)

more thoughts on art

Over at The Voodoo Cafe's Blog Ricë Freeman-Zachery has been talking about her trip to California and how the pictures in the LA Art Museum just didn't do it for her

Its interesting timing that she wrote about this now as I've been thinking about the whole "what's art" thing for the past few days

I got a copy of this book for Christmas, and I've been slowly working my way through all 400 quilts, reading the artist statements with each one, examining the descriptions of the materials and the techniques.

Let me say very clearly first that I ADORE this book. It takes you WAAAAAAAYYYY out on the edge of "quilting", and challenges your preconceived notions about just what a "quilt" is.

I must also say, however that there are a number of these quilts that even after reading all the stuff the artist says, I still just don't get it. In fact there are a couple of them that reading what the artist says makes me say even more "HUHH?!"

As someone not having a degree in art, never worked in oils and can't draw a representative picture, I figured it was just that I was not educated enough to understand what was going on.

Guess what -- after reading what Ricë had to say about it and having recently had a conversation with a friend that does have an art degree -- I'm feeling much better about it

I'm thinking that art, like beauty, is in the eye of the beholder --

so is my work in fabrics and beads art? I think so. Is it beautiful? Yup, or at least some of it is -- some of it also meets the other definitions of art -- it communicates ideas -- and if I'm doing that, I think I'm doing ok

coming full circle and outsider art

have you ever noticed how things go in circles?

the first thing I remember making with my own two hands as a doll made out of a sock -- she had embroidered eyes and 2 fat braids made out of yarn -- her neck was kind of floppy, but she had that soft "squeezy-ness" that made for a good cloth doll

over the years I've made a lot of dolls -- really detailed Raggedy Anns (and Andys), needle sculpted "cabbage patch" style dolls, porcelain dolls -- and now after having made almost exclusively teddy bears for 25 years I'm drawn back to the human form -- having started a cloth doll again

styles, however have changed -- beaded faces, a woman's form (OMG, she has a bosom! and a woman's hips and tummy, not a skinny pre-teen version!!) and the whole idea is pretty scary --- but fun none the less

and once again we're crossing into unknown territory -- for the past few years my every thought when I've begun a piece has been "will it sell?" -- and I'm trying quite deliberately not to think about that whole issue as I put this one together -- just to express an idea, enjoy working with the materials

perhaps this is my own little ode to outsider art

outsider art was originally defined as the art of the insane -- okay, we won't open that whole kettle of worms -- but I'm thinking Van Gogh here (LOVE Starry, starry night, and yes, I know he was in the asylum!) --

more recently outsider art has come to mean all of those of us that work outside of the standard "paint and sculpture" model -- those of us who are self taught -- those of us who work with fiber and found objects

Hurrah! at least now I'm part of a recognized "movement" --

and still crazy after all these years!

not again with the water works.......

house + water = pain in the *$$

It seems like it never ends -- the issues with water that is

Friday evening we noticed that there was water leaking around the base of the toilet in the downstairs bathroom

About 6 years ago we had replaced that toilet from what was here when we bought the house -- because it was leaking around the base (and we decided a low flow model was a better choice)

At the time of that replacement, the DH had been through a shoulder surgery, so we hired a local handyman to do the work. When he pulled up the old toilet, we discovered that when the floor had been redone, the ceramic tile had not been taken close enough to the opening in the floor, so the shifting weight of the potty had broken the wax seal -- hence the water on the floor -- so the repair man put in some "shims".

Well, it seams that his shims have now given way and we're back to the problem again.

I'm annoyed.

We went off to the hardware store yesterday and purchased repair items. Since we're going to have to tear the whole thing apart to reset it AGAIN! and because we had started to have some issues with the valve not shutting off properly and the old seat is now cracked, we got all of the necessary parts for the repair man to come and take care of it for us.

Oh yes, and there at the top left of the picture, that brown square? That's a ceramic tile of the kind the floor is made of -- purchased specifically for its thickness and the material its made of -- use your imagination -- that's the appropriate shim!

The truly correct "fix" would be for the toilet to come out and the tile redone in there, but I'm not going there, mostly because neither one of us is strong enough to set a toilet by ourselves anymore and there is no way to have 2 people and the toilet in that little room at the same time.

Anyway, I'm sure by the time we pay the guy to do the work we'll be looking at the $100 neighborhood

Remind me again why I want to OWN a house and all its problems --- geeesh! (guess I should be grateful we aren't looking at a bigger bill than that)

in need of music therapy

My daughter, bless her, knows how to get to me

I mentioned here that she gave me a CD for my birthday that I had been wanting (Sarah Brightman's Symphony)

What I didn't mention was that she also gave me 2 other CDs -- one is the sound track from the new Broadway version of The Little Mermaid and the other is a sound track from Company

I realize that one of the things I miss the most about the fact that she is now an adult with a husband and a home of her own is that there is no music in our house

Having spent the last few days in a funk (because I'm really, REALLY missing the trip to California I was supposed to have made over this weekend), this morning I decided to listen to all of those new CDs again, and I think it has actually helped lift some of the dark heavy cloud

new wallpaper

back in February I submitted a couple of essays for consideration to write for a Denver paper's Op-Ed section on Sundays

This little goodie arrived yesterday, basically a "thanks, but no thanks"

ok, one more rejection slip for the walls

nuts