who me?

It has been an amazingly strange week.

On Tuesday I went into the local fabric store to pick up a couple of quilt batts for tops that were ready and some other odds and ends and I got into a conversation with one of the assistant managers in the store.

By the end of the conversation she knew that I make art quilts, she had invited me to a meeting of the quilt guild that she is president of, and had asked me if I would come and talk at her guild about art quilts.

Last night I went and visited the guild meeting, met some really fun ladies and was told that the program chairman would "mail me a contract" for my "trunk show"

Reality (and a bit of panic) is beginning to set in. Who me? "TRUNK SHOW"?!

Ok, I have a bit of time to think about it, and maybe someone who has ever been to one of these things can tell me what is expected --- please?

Meantime, this week I have sort of figured out that the phase of my artistic life that involved making teddy bears has passed. (In the words of Carlye Simon "that part of our life together is over").

While I have enjoyed that, and it has brought me some monetary rewards and some great friends, what I am interested in and drawn to now has changed, and the collector base has changed, and those shows are how 1)far away and 2)expensive to do

I would rather put the money to shows where I can sell those things that are my current passion

This also means that shortly I will probably be selling off some of my fabrics and supplies for bear making --- so I can get materials for other things

like I said, it's been a strange week

when watching TV is a good thing

Usually in the evening I work on quilting and knitting while I'm comfortably seated in my recliner in front of the TV.

Some nights the TV is just noise or light entertainment.

Last night was one of those rare occasions when what was on TV actually slowed down the process of the projects.

Since the presidental campaign we have been in the habit of watching Keith Olbermann's show in the evenings (it comes on right at dinner time for us). One of my favorite things is when he does a special comment.

If you are not familiar with him, his show or the special comment, these are the TV media's equivalant of the featured editorial column in the newspaper. He takes on issues of the day that strike him as important and speaks out in a very personal and opinionated way.

Most of the time when I watch these, I agree with him and cheer him on.

Last night he was talking about health care -- not just in the short 5 minute version of a special comment as he usually does, but for a WHOLE HOUR!

While he was talking I was alternately shouting and crying.

Talking about fear -- bad enough that you worry about what the diagnosis will be, but then, especially if you are minimally insured, you worry about how you will ever pay for it. (I remember an interview with a woman during the August town hall meetings where she said "why have the mammogram if you can't afford the cancer?" -- chilling!)

I can not begin to convey the power of what he said, so if you haven't seen it, use this link and go take a look -- or read the text of what he said, although hearing him talk about his father is much more effective.

And Olbermann's show was not the only "stop you in your tracks" show last night.

Later in the evening we flipped over to PBS, where they were showing an episode in their Craft in America series.

One of the artists they interviewed for this episode was a print maker, and they actually showed him at work creating one of the wood block prints. They showed how he uses tracing paper over his original drawing then flips it over to make the imprint on the wood he will carve --- it gave me goosebumps as that is exactly the same process I use when I create one of the stamps that I use -- no one taught me to do this, I just sort of did it -- and he talked about that self same journey of discovery.

I can't wait to see more of the episodes in this year's series.

Slowly I turned

For most of the time since I retired from my corporate job, I have been trying to figure out who the "new me" is.

After all, the way I had defined myself for years before had been where I worked, and as my daughter's mother.

Suddenly both of those identities had been swept away in the sense that I was no longer employed, and my daughter had actually grown up and become her own independent woman.

So what was I supposed to do with the next 30 or so years?

It has been a slow and many times painful journey.

And since I began blogging almost three years ago, I have used this space to talk about the things that have just needed to be blurted out.

In the past few months I have sensed something different -- a sort of returning to things that I had been interested in before and just after my college days -- a returning to the fiber arts and the writing.

Along the way I have found others who, through their own blogs, have turned my thoughts in new ways to those old themes.

One of those blogs is written by a woman who lives in the area of California that we left when we retired. We share a number of things -- and when I read her blog and get a little glimpse into her world I am reminded that a lot of who we are has to do with how we respond to the challenges we face.

She has faced hers with grace. I'm ashamed to say I have not always done so.

I still have much to learn, but I sense a slow turning of the key in a very rusty lock

Getting satisfaction -- sort of

In response to the comment that ask which piece I saw someone wearing, here is a picture of it.

It took me a couple of days to dig through the photos of jewelry that is gone, but here it is

Interestingly, this was not my favorite of the two pieces on this music theme that I made. I really liked the one that had a trumpet and a keyboard, but the lady that bought this loves it, so it's all ok



Yesterday I got my check from the State Fair for my prize money.

Because of my complaint, next year the fair folks will not change any piece entered to a different catagory without first consulting with the person that entered it.

They have still not satisfactorily answered some of my other questions, but I'll take that little bit of progress anyway.

Time to get busy!

Fizzy Lifting Drinks and Finding Purpose

Last week, as I was in the crunch of putting the finishing touches on the charity auction, my daughter starting giving me Emergen C to help me keep from catching my son-in-law's head cold.

If you are familiar with the original movie of Willie Wonka, you may remember Charlie's adventure with the Fizzy Lifting Drinks.

We started calling the Emergen C "fizzy lifting drink", and had a good laugh about it. This week I'm still using the stuff as a "just in case" --- the raspberry is pretty good tasting.

Today I got an email telling me that the total amount earned from my efforts was about $13,000, giving them about $8,000 after expenses to put toward the production of the next opera.

That number makes me feel really good. It tells me that I did a good job.

While it may sound a little silly, it feels really good to have done such a big job and have it be so successful.

The past few years I have had some times that I have felt a bit useless -- the result of having retired from the corporate job and having my daughter leave home all at about the same time.

Coordinating the auction and working with adults toward a goal has been very rewarding (if some days exasperating!).

It's good to feel like there is a purpose to what I am doing.

Now it's on to the next adventure.

Exhausted, exasperated, exhilarated

Exhausted --- yup, setting up and running the auction was lots of work

several days last week were spent "pounding the keys" to get the data into a form that the cashiers could work with

then we spent a couple of evenings creating baskets out of the various pieces that had been donated to us

Exasperated --- the worst part of the whole event is the bundling up of the packages at the end of the process

there was not really enough space to take things from the numerical sequence to the alphabetical sequence and we had about 45 minutes of just waiting for the cashiers to do their work before we could even start doing that

and by then we had people waiting at the door to pick stuff up

Exhilarated --- last year I had donated a piece of jewelry to the auction

over the years of doing shows, I've donated a lot of things to auctions or as door prizes, and I've sold a lot of my art -- bears, jewelry

for the most part after I hand over the piece, I never know again if the person that bought it or received it actually likes it or uses it or if it just ends up in a box somewhere and will eventually end up in a garage sale or a trash can

so as I sat at the back of the room while people went through the auction it was an amazing feeling to look up and see someone actually wearing the piece of jewelry I donated last year

not only was she wearing it, but she had added a piece of chain to the back of it to extend it to the perfect length for her and she adores it

at the intermission she came back and ask me to sign the back of it

how amazing ----

R.I.P. Mary

when I was a teenager I was more a fan of folk singers than rock and roll

even though I listened to the Beetles, I loved passionately the music of Peter, Paul and Mary

and although at that time in my life I didn't have the financial means to buy the albums, I listened to the radio and knew the tune and lyric to almost every song

so when I heard this morning that she was gone, I felt very sad

I'm really glad that we have all of those wonderful recordings of her reminding us that we have a social responsibility to those around us who are less fortunate that we

R.I.P.

thoughts on when a blue ribbon is a bad thing

This is the quilt my DH and I designed and made for our son-in-law, hanging in the display at the State Fair.

See there on the bottom edge --- a blue ribbon

When I first saw this at the Fair, I was thrilled

Yesterday we went to the fair grounds to pick up our entries as the fair is now over

Right now, I'm unhappy about that blue ribbon

Why? Because the fair committee for this division decided when they did the judging that this was in the wrong catagory.

I entered it in the catagory that was described as "Original design, quilt or comforter, hand quilted"

They moved it to the catagory described as "Quilt, applique, hand quilted"

And yes, it is a quilt, yes it is appliqued and yes it is hand quilted. But what I'm upset about is that they decided, after I stated on my entry form that it was an original design, that it was not.

EXCUSE ME!??

Upset I guess is not really the word --- totally enraged is better.

Oh yes, and when I asked about it at pick up, the two ladies that were manning the area said "well there's so many parrot patterns out there......"

I don't care if there are a billion parrot patterns out there --- I didn't use one of those! Each and every little feather on this quilt was hand drawn by the DH and hand sewn by me.

And what about the quilter that placed second in this catagory because they decided to move my work here? That quilter should be angry too because the competition was not fair.

I sent off an email this morning to the only contact I have at the fair, trying to find out if there is someone specific I can address this issue to. Failing that, I will just write a letter to the entries department.

Much as I love to win (and yes, I DO love to win), this is not the right way

as the title says --- some random thoughts

I'm drowning in paperwork for the charity auction I volunteered to chair; it's been at least 6 weeks since I've visited some of the blogs I used to get to once a week; and I had signed up to do "class work" over at Marty's blog, but haven't done a one.

Fall is coming, the squash in the garden are setting on, the neighbor FINALLY moved his wood pile and instead of us having to, he actually repaired the fence, which means I'll get to paint the garden shed.

Over the weekend I had two days in the row that I felt energetic and strong again so I cleaned out another shelf in the linen closet (only one to go!!) and washed all of those things as well as a whole tub full of assorted dresser scarves, table cloths, doilies and napkins (all of which had been just sitting in that tub for probably 6 or 7 years!).

Yesterday I once again felt like I'd been run through the knot hole ---- BLEAH!!

Ok, I guess this whole recovering thing will continue to be two steps forward and one step back.

This morning I actually did get to one of the blogs I read almost every day while I was recovering (I hadn't been there in nearly a week!), and found myself smiling at her adventures and longing for a group of friends like she has.

I can't wait for the auction to be done so I can get on with planning and working to sell the house and move closer to our daughter --- with a deliberate plan to find that group!

in the garden

we've had a busy little spider!

this amazing web is over an evergreen tree right outside the patio door --- I took about a dozen pictures, and this is the only one where you can really see the web

(I used a squirt bottle to put a very fine mist of water over the web, so what makes it visable are the tiny little water droplets on the web)










even though the hail beat up some of the sunflowers, they are a hardy bunch and have decided to bloom anyway

I've noticed that there are a lot more bees in the garden now that they have bloomed too

so next year when I plant, I may think about planting some flowers out there in with the crops to help draw the bees






and here is why I want more bees ---

see him there in the blossom?

busy gathering necture to make honey

oh yeah, and pollinating the squash blossom

yup, we want more bees










so I can see more blossoms that look like this!

a pumpkin!

this year we planted acorn squash, hubbard squash and pumpkins, and it's looking like we might actually get some of each --- as long as there is no more hail and the frosts don't come too early



since we're getting toward fall now, it's time to do those chores that need to happen before the snow flies

today I'm planning to scrape the old cracked paint off of the garden shed so I can give it a fresh coat of paint --- and we'll be taking a look at the fence next to the shed to see what we need to do to it too

In praise of good kids

I have a great kid

and she married a really great kid too

she reads my blogs and follows along with the "trials and tribulations" as well as the artistic endeavors

last week she saw my post about the medical bills and the tight budget and that my little piece in the budget for art supplies would be cut yet again

when I got home yesterday from our trip to the fair, there was an envelope in the mail

pretty card (Sunflowers by Monet, which is a whole special connection of it's own) with a note from my daughter and her husband and a gift card to our local craft store

when I called her and asked what the occassion was, she said she can't magically make the medical bills go away, but she can help keep me from being so depressed by keeping me in art supplies (she knows how far I can stretch this card by using coupons and shopping sales) --- her husband says a lot of the art work ends up at their house, so they should help "support my habit"

love it

like I said --- I have great kids

Shame on us

we seen to have forgotten this horror as we've moved along crashing the economy -- seems to me this was perhaps the beginning of that crash



but the economy is really the least of the shame of New Orleans and how our government left the city to die




the real shame here is that we are 4 years later and there are huge areas that are still just piles of trash ---- it took less time to rebuild sections of Europe after WWII



shame on us

yet another whine

sorry folks, and for those of you that just don't want to read another blog where someone complains, take a clue and stop reading here

I went over the growing stack of bills yesterday --- and let me tell you, it is enough to make a grown woman cry

so far I have yet to receive a single bill for the actual surgery, but plenty of them on the diagnostic procedure done as an out patient the month before

after looking at these and doing some calculations based on what I do know, the bills will probably be in the $4000 to $5000 range

at the amount that I can AFFORD to pay on a monthly basis, that figures to be something that will take several years to pay off --- if the various places that have billed are willing to work it out with me

I'm not hopeful about that

And so the harrassement begins

I got the first phone call yesterday

The one from the business office of the first doctor I went to (that did such a pathetic job with the testing that it all had to be redone).

So here's the conversation:

Office: You know you have a bill of $720.
Me: Yes, and I've been sending you a $10 check monthly.
Office: I see that on the records, but we like to have these amounts paid off within 90 days, or they want us to turn them over to collections.
Me: Well, I'd like that too, but I'm not able to do that (and I'm thinking "you can't get blood out of a turnip!")
Office: Could you just put it on a credit card?
Me: No, I don't even have a credit card.
Office: Could you pay $100 a month.
Me: No, I can't do that, we live on a fixed income and I have other medical bills from just having surgery.
Office: Well, could you manage $25?
Me: Maybe, it depends on what the rest of the bills from the surgery are when they arrive.
Office: Let me send you some paperwork on our financing plans.
Me: Ok

This should be interesting, we'll see what her "paperwork" looks like (oh and just as a side note, for the first procedure I have a $395 bill to the new doctor, and before the insurance pays the little it will pay, the bill for the actual surgery is $3500 just to the doctor)

Even if the Congress does the right thing and actually makes the changes we need, it will not help any for this situation.

Its going to be a long difficult struggle to get all of this paid off --- knowing what I know now I should have just ignored the problem

recovery thoughs

this should probably be subtitled "why I'm not a good patient"

I don't tolerate being told "you can't do that" very well, and I'm very used to being the one that just gets up and does whatever it is that needs doing

in fact, even before the surgery I was very frustrated now and then about not being as strong or as able to do things as I had been even just a few years ago

now that is even worse of course, wondering if this will get better or it's just going to be that way

so the last couple of days I'm sort of struggling -- I don't want just sit, and even though I'm working on projects, I'm having a serious case of "why bother" since there are no shows in the near future to be thinking about, and internet selling has been basically a bust too ----

just trying to be grateful that all of the shows I had applied to and sent money to were willing to refund us because I had a medical reason

wishing I was back in my California friend's kitchen, sharing ideas and learning new painting techniques and not feeling so isolated

now and then it would be good to have a friend that was within easy reach

More about image

along with creating new "clean" graphics for the website, I'm thinking about other places to have my things available for purchase.

For quite a while I have had a store on Etsy, which I am thinking of closing or at least changing the name of so it has the same name as my own website --- just to make things easier for anyone that might be looking for my stuff.

But there are also some new venues out there that I'm thinking might be a good match for my pieces too.

These new places have some things in common with Etsy, but some differences too.

Here are the new places I've discovered so far:

1000 Markets there are both free and fee shops on this site

Art Fire so far I haven't been able to get much information about this site because it keeps crashing my browser --- not a good sign!

Trunkt a juried site that is not accepting any new applications until August 15

So, where should I go? Where will my creations fit best?

things to think about

Figuring out my "image"

One of the things I had thought about doing while I'm recovering from my surgery is redesigning my web site.

I do that from time to time, trying to keep it "fresh" and to add new things to it.

This time, I'm struggling with just what do I want it to look like --- partly because I've changed what I do so much, and partly because I think it's time that all of the studio's online presence had a unified, professional look (scary thought!)

A while back I created this graphic, which I have been using for a while as the banner on the current website.

Along with that main graphic I also created these and a few others to use as "buttons" on the site.

Now I'm trying to come up with a new look that still makes use of all the work that went into creating the graphics.

and I want to figure out a way to put the newest pieces of work on the front page first, no matter what area they're going to end up in eventually.

There are also several new sales venues online that I'm going to be checking out. Etsy just doesn't seem to be doing it for my stuff. Although I admit I've not done much out there lately, and I know you need to be adding stuff more often, I just don't think my stuff is the "style" that Etsy promotes, and I'm not going to start doing stuff that looks like everyone else's style just to sell stuff there.

So, what do I want my "image" to look like? I'm working on it

Stormy weather

We had a bit of a storm yesterday afternoon

For about 15 minutes it was really noisy and the rain and hail just came down like someone had opened the bottom of a dump truck

These pictures show the leaves that were all stuck to the front of the house and the car afterwards (the cottonwood leaves are from the trees across the street!)


this is the little pile of hail still sitting under a bush in our front yard about half an hour after the storm --- we got about half an inch of moisture too

so, my garden took a beating --- the corn, which had not been doing very well anyway because it's just not been like summer here this year (only 2 days over 90 degrees is just not normal), is pretty beat up

This morning the tomatoes are perking up tho', and I think the summer squash and beans survived --- not so sure about the other squash yet ----

weird, weird weather continues this week too --- our high temperatures will be in the 70s for several days --- cooler here than in Alaska

and the final insult? because folks haven't been using as much water on lawns, gardens, etc., this summer, the water company is saying they'll have to raise our rates to make up for lost revenue ----AAAACCCCKKKK!!!!

TV Remote Roulette

This picture makes me think of an old Kay Starr song. Remember The Wheel of Fortune?

The wheel of fortune
Goes spinning around
....
While the wheel is spining, spinning, spinning

It's a good description of how we view TV programs some evenings --- if there is nothing on that we know we want to watch, the DH plays what we refer to as remote roulette ---- just flipping through all 957 channels (ok, probably not actually that many, but there are a lot of channels on cable nowdays!) until we run across something that is not

a)obnoxious (ie reality tv of any sort)

or

b)something we've seen enough times to recite the dialogue along with the actors

Twice in the past week we have won the jack pot (so to speak) as we have come across art classes being televised on the local school district's access channel.

Last week was about painting and explained some techniques that I had recently done on fabric with my friend in California. It was nice to have those reinforced and to see how the same techniques work on another surface.

Last night it was a wonderful program about doing prints --- as in the whole stamp cutting print making process that we have also been doing with fabrics.

It was pretty exciting to see other materials used, but the same techniques that we have used to produce such things as this:

a stamp cut and stamped on fabric that has been embellished with beads, embroidery, markers and applique and is now being quilted










and this stamp which has not yet been embellished






This whole print making process is considered Fine Art by those who know about such things

I'm hoping to catch more of those art lessons at random times

Yup, I can just hear Kay Starr --- spinning, spinning, spinning

wherein my daughter declares I'm a geek

Things at work here:

1. Since I'm having surgery next Friday (July 17) and my sister (the TRAINED nurse) will be here when I come home to help take care of me, she came down yesterday and went to the pre-op doctor's appointment with me.

2. Since today (July 11) is her birthday (Happy Birthday sis!!) I invited her to stay and have dinner with us. And yes there was CAKE!!! (yummy carrot cake with real cream cheese frosting)

3. Since she was going to spend the day, she brought along her laptop and we worked on sharing information on family history.

So when my daughter called, I told her that my sister and I were sitting with our laptops back to back exchanging data on family history (I've been working on this project off and on for almost 30 years, and my sister is trying to catch up!)

My daughter said "Mom, you two are geeks!"

heh, yeah, like she should talk --- this from the child that credits me with helping to teach her to touch type --- when she was in Junior High school we'd sit in the same room and Instant Message to each other

hehe

Love it, and I'm hoping that I'll feel well enough at least part of the time my sister's here after my surgery that we can do some more "geeking"